student123.com | Ferrari fire Pit Crew!

"Ferrari's F1 Team has fired its entire Pit Crew according to reports from Modena, Italy.

The announcement follows Ferrari's decision to take advantage of the Scottish Government's "Work For the Dole" Scheme and hire unemployed youths from the Gorbels.

The decision to hire them was brought on by a recent documentary on how unemployed youths in Glasgow's suburbs were able to remove a set of car wheels in less than 6 seconds without proper equipment, whereas Ferrari's existing crew requires more than 8 seconds using "state of the art equipment".

Taking on this new crew was thought to be an excellent yet bold move by Ferrari Management. As most races are won and lost in the pits, Ferrari would have an advantage over every other team.

However, Ferrari's expectations were exceeded, as during the Crew's first practice session; not only were "de boyz fea Weggie" able to change the tyres in under 6 seconds, but within a further 12 seconds they had resprayed, re-badged, and sold the vehicle to the McLaren Team for four dozen bottles of 'buckie' and a gram of the 'good weed'. "